memories-
Sunday, May 28, 2006
:( junda's talking about the china trip! rwar!
im SO irritated and troubled. like maybe i cant even go send them off cus of some one-star course. and mrs tan haven gotten back to me about the course i took last year! i am so irritated, but can only pray that she replies soon enough. i want to go send them off :'( well, but nobody cares if i go or not anyway.
i dunno. cant say much, but my heart's definitely heavier now. shrugs. the fact was that nobody even asked. life's just that bad.
saturday- training as usual, and the moment i got home, i slept till evening, until i din even want to go to the food fair that i've long planned to go.
sunday- optional trainin, took the red boat with wenqi- quite an experience lar. guess what? i actually met junda at macritchie! he going trekkin!
just came back from the food fair at Expo. quite crowded. we bought alot of food! but hurhur the weight was no kick compared to the weights at the gym. my nuah brother initially kept complaining abt his load, but i realised mine was much heavier? so coincidental, met my dad's director's daughter there, she doing the noodles for ppl to sample. the world's jus this small.
i really pray for mrs tan to reply soon, but i doubt so. are teachers that inefficient? or, the scf person will reply with a positive reply, so that i do not have to take the course!! im very irritated. spoil my plans for nothing. guess its fated for everything to clash. argh!
its so disappointin- the china trip. sigh. life isnt fair! i do hope i wont have any regrets come july. that regret will lead to a series of regrets which will definitely stay on with me forever. what else can i do? but to focus on what i need to do, and make certain sacrifices more worthwhile.
after a year plus away frm dhs, i realised that im still stranded out there- nowhere. after awhile, i land back at the same train of thought. same pessimistic thought. all my concerns in sec4 is now amplified. i look at them, and think, will i ever be part of them? be like them? to me they are close, but to them its otherwise i guess.
everything seems to be tangled up for me now :( its so full of question marks.
23:38
-keeps me alive
